Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Having a fat day

I is having fat day. 

Today I felt like I gained weight - like I'm 300 pounds and bursting out of my own non-elastic skin. It's ok. Fat days are just the fat in your head be all crazy like. 

I weigh 216.7 pounds as of this morning. That means I'm down 6 pounds since the start of my attempt to improve myself 1 month ago. I'm not as fat as my fattest day but I feel more like it today than any other. 

2 reasons and it's both clothing related. 

1. I chose to wear pants that are a size too small so not only do I look fatter for muffin topping these things but the squeezing sensation adds the feeling of being overweight and I get self-conscience. So I threw on more clothes on my too half to hide the muffin top which added to my overall dowdy look. 

2. I went clothing shopping and nothing fit. Silly me. My own clothes barely fit me right now and I went to a store shopping for the size I last remember being - which appears to be 1 or 2 sizes smaller than I am now. 

In another 10 pounds I will revisit these muffin too pants and my favourite clothing outlet and see how it's all going. 

Fat days are apart of girl life. They may be apart of guy life too but whoever is having one you just have to remember a fat day is not an "I'm an overweight loser who should not leave the house ever and while I'm at it where's that untouched chocolate cake I'm gonna eat it all cuz I'm fat and nothing can save me" day. 

A fat day is a psychological indicator that you are on this day unhappy with your physical appearance. It has nothing to do with your actual weight or health. This isn't to say you can just think happy thoughts and make it go away. I'm having a fat day as I type all this. I'm comprehending of the fact I weigh less and am working to get healthier - but damn these pants are tight and making me want to Quasimodo it up a tower. I feel fat!! 

So I just have to remind myself it isn't real and not to jump ship on my progress just because I'm having these feelings. I will definitely feel even fatter and worse about myself if I go check in to the local Ben and Jerry icecream factory for the wekeend. I also need to reality check my ideals in the clothing store. Like I said - nothing seemed to fit me today but that doesn't mean it will be that way next time I go. Work a little harder, lose a little more and go back in a month. Maybe that really cool dress that nearly fit me will be on sale ;)

If I was more motivated at this point I would go exercise. I'm not there yet. I'm motivated enough to go home and get out of these leg prisons they call pants and have a shower. Showers are refreshing. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

Successful Completion of Trip

Wow.  Cavalia is awesome.  As in the previous post I said it was difficult to go on trips and keep eating right for 2 reasons – fast food and Celiac Disease.  Typically I’d go without eating if I couldn’t satisfy the Celiac issue because I’d rather be hungry than be sick. 

So on this trip I ate out 4 times. I was going to go into detail about it but seriously if you are ever curious what I’m eating day to day you can check me out on FitnessPal.  I did not eat healthy on this trip.  I just ate what was available.

I also ate whatever today because I got lazy.  I’m supposed to go home and get myself a meal but I have to drive 20 minutes to get there and I just really didn’t feel like it.  It’s a good thing that I have a 9 hour shift that gives me 1.5 hours of break time as I use it to drive to and from my house to have my lunch.  Sometimes I bring lunch to work but the issue with that is when people see you eating at your desk they think you can still work while you eat.  Sure, I could but I’m trying to watch Psyche or an equally silly show on Netflix for my break.

PiYo is on it's way to my house still.  I need to sit down and make a work out calendar.  I go swimming every Tuesday and Thursday with my mom.  It’s an Aquasize class that takes place at the Crescent Heights Leisure Centre.  I started taking it to help improve the muscle strength in my right knee.

What’s wrong with it you ask?  Not too terribly sure yet.  I injured it while kneeling (ironically I was kneeling because I was installing foam on the floor to help my other knee).  This was back in March and I don’t have an MRI until August.  I can walk mostly without a limp at this point but I can’t speed walk, job, run, climb stairs or turn too suddenly.  I’m still very surprised how slow it is taking to heal and I keep worrying something is more wrong with it than there appears to be.  I really expected it to be crap for a month and then I’d be back at work – at this point I’m wondering if there may be permanent damage and if I will ever be able to move fast again. 

True story from my vacation: while walking to the Cavalia show Ryan ran ahead to meet up with our group and I somehow took a slight turn off the path and ended up having to cross 4 lanes of traffic with no intersection and a large meridian in the middle blocking my path.  It was a fairly busy highway section.  I got across the first 2 lanes at my normal hobble without any vehicles coming but once I mountain climbed the 2 foot tall meridian and was 1/3 way across the 3rd lane vehicles started coming around the corner.  I didn’t want to die so I tried to speed up and much to my dismay I found a locking sensation in my knee and a twinge in my thigh that told me I was at my top speed.  Thankfully, the drivers didn’t want to kill me either so they must have slowed down just enough for me to hobble pass them to the grass.  I did get some honks :( Sorry guys!

…what was the point I was making before this tangent?  Oh yes, calendar.  I need to make one to include my low impact Aquasize workout that I’m doing to help my knee and I’m going to try and do PiYo (it’s Pilates and Yoga in one) to see if I can help my knee along even more while trying to lose weight.  It’s also supposed to be low impact so I’m hoping I can manage to work with it.  My doctor keeps telling me I need to lose weight in order to get some stress off my knees but it’s all a catch 22 when I can’t do the work outs that would give me the best results because I’m a gimp.

I’m still going to try.  I was also considering incorporating my Wii Fit into the progress.  I never use my Wii so I might as well put it to work.  Wii Fit does mostly balance stuff so that will hopefully be good in regaining the balance I lost through all my knee problems.

Saturday, July 19, 2014


So, one of the things I find the hardest to manage so as not to throw out all the hard work of exercising and eating better is a road trip. 

I'm currently on one. We are going from Medicine Hat to Edmonton to watch Cavalia. 

One additional issue with this drive is my poor bunk knee. It's only been an hour and it's started to ache and will likely soon swell. Taking Aleve to help but I could be in for a rocky ride. 

Back to the original point. For this trip I'm having an Ice Cap for breakfast. Let's face it I have an Ice Cap nearly everyday. I've become addicted and will have to downgrade from a medium to a small and then try to not have them 5 to 6 days a week. 

While away I will have an enormous issue trying to find 1.  Healthy food options 2. Gluten free food options. 

Many times I opt to not eat because there is nothing that suits these 2 requirements. 

The good news for this trip is that I haven't fully vested myself to new exercising routines or eating a ton better so I mostly will worry about gluten free. 


Friday, July 18, 2014

Star Date 7172014 - Starting Over...

I'm Krys Christoffersen and I'm a beached whale.  I would like to get it out there before anyone thinks I'm being down on myself or depressed.  I am fat and I may never be as thin as I would like - and I'm good with that.  I ENJOY referring to myself as fat, whale-like, manatee related or genetically spliced with a marshmallow.  It's OK!

I think that too many people take themselves too seriously.  I have body image problems but I feel better about them when I crack wise because I'm an incredibly sarcastic and awesome human being.  I used to be down on myself and couldn't bring myself to say anything good about me even in job interviews.  My self depreciating humor started me on a good path and I know it's unusual for most people to grasp that a positive can start out from a negative.  After I got used to acknowledging through humor my flaws I was able to then actually accept my qualities which is a far greater asset than just not saying I'm fat.  It took me to the age of 26 to realize I'm not an entirely useless skin bag rolling around through life shoving chips and cookies into her maw.

Thus this is the realization I came to: Sure, the world thinks fat people are gross, stupid and sort of a waste of space but when more than 2.1 BILLION people are fat just like you (that's 29% of the World Pop people) and 40% of the world population use the internet - I'm guessing the only people telling me I'm gross are the 29% fat people or at least a huge portion of them that don't realize they're the pot calling the kettle black.

I'm not advocating to increase the fatness population though and on the total flip side of the above statements I am starting a weight loss "thing" to improve my knees, my health, my weight and my self-esteem.  I feel like I'm just a better person when I work out - I may not lose weight but I feel like I look better and just feeling better about yourself should make whatever you do worth doing.

So here I go.  I'm taking the plunge and will be starting to work out more (currently doing Aqua Size 2x a week at our Leisure Centre) and will try my best to eat more healthy.

Did I mention I have Celiac Disease too? Yep.